i just visited your page. i'm very young to be a cutter... and i desperatly want to stop. i pray to God every night but sometimes i still get the urge to cut myself. i'm trying my hardest not too.. i think it just gets me farther away from God, that is not something i want to do. i don't know what is bothering me..thats whats weird about it...like i have a problem-just don't know what it is! can you help me? do you have any suggestions on what i could do when i get the urge? please email me back if you can help. thank you.
Thank you for writing me. I will assume since you said you are praying that you are a Christian. If not then that is where you need to start. You need to understand that you as well as everyone else in the world were born as a sinner. God loves you and that is why He sent His Son to die for your sins. But we have to believe that and ask Him to forgive us before we are forgiven.
As I said I am assuming that you are already a child of God. I noticed that you said in your message that you are trying your hardest to stop. I think that is the problem. You see we are not capable ourselves to stop the things which we don't want to do. We need God's help. But it is not as simple as just asking Him to help us.
God loves us and He wants to help us but it is usually us ourselves which stand in the way of that help. We are not capable of during everything ourselves no matter how hard we want to. I won't tell you that I am the expert but I will tell you that I too have had struggles where I wanted to do something good or did not want to continue to do something bad and was not able on my own to accomplish it.
Here is what I found out for myself. I was trying to do things on my own, even though I was calling out to God to help me. I just could not handle it myself, no matter how hard I tried. It was only after I gave up and told God that He had to do it for me that I was able to live the kind of life I wanted to live. But there is more to it than that, I had to make God the Lord of my life. I had to allow Him to run my life and that is hard to do, when you want to be in control. I have not found another way.
I have to get up everyday and realize that it is not what I want for that day it is what God wants. I have to give Him control of my whole life. There are several ways to help you do this. For instance I try to read my Bible everyday, that helps me get closer to God and know Him better. It also strengthens your faith. (Romans 10:17 NIV) Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.
I also try to spend time with God everyday. Time to pray and just think about Him and let Him deal with me. That is part of having a personal relationship with someone. I found that the more control I give Him of my life the easier it was to not do what I did not want to do and to do what I wanted to do. This is a struggle everyone has in one form or another.
You are so right that the things we do often cause us feel farther away from God. I don't know what is bothering you, but even if you don't understand what it is, you can go to God and talk to Him about it. He will help you. Every time the thought of cutting yourself comes into your mind you need to start talking to God. Ask Him to help you get it out of your mind. Put on some Christian praise music, it will help too. You need to remember this is a battle between you and Satan and you need God's help with it. If you have accepted Christ into your heart as your Savior then your body is the Temple of God. That is where the Holy Spirit lives. Satan hates that so he would love for you to do something to harm that temple. You have to just give it to God and be willing to let Him handle it. The point is as you have seen, you can't fight this alone when it is happening, you also need to fight it before it happens. What I mean is that you need to pray about this and talk to God about it when it is not happening to you too. You need to strengthen your faith and as I quoted earlier that comes from reading your Bible.
I will pray for you too. If you would like to discuss this further please feel free to write me.
E-Mail Ralph (Whose comments are in green)